Zombies may not be real but the question has crossed all of our minds… Will you be ready to survive an undead onslaught? Here are a few tips on how to survive a plague of the walking dead!
- Invest in a seriously kickass fortified bunker.
- Ensure that your bunker is fully stocked with non-perishable food rations, water, water purification tablets, first aid, medicine, entertainment, weaponry and other supplies such as batteries, a good knife, a can opener, torches, and matches.
- The best type of weaponry: axes, grenade launchers, machetes, katanas and pretty much anything that will either decapitate or sever the brain stem of a zombie. Ideally you won’t want to get too close so try to go for something long range.
- It will also be in your best interest to invest in some lightweight, bite-proof body armour and a helmet. Preferably lined with Kevlar. You’re also going to want to go for comfort and versatility when it comes to footwear.
- If the zombie apocalypse sneaks up on you and you find yourself without a fully stocked bunker make your way to the nearest mall or military base. Make sure that you go for a mall that isn’t too big and is easy to secure.
- If you do decide to go with a mall, make sure that you barricade all glass doors and windows. Zombies love crashing through glass about as much as they enjoy nomming on brains.
- Once you’ve secured your home base it’s important to start fortifying your defenses and expanding your perimeter. Ideally you’ll want to build a trench with heavy-duty metal spikes. Don’t underestimate the power of a good electrified fence. It may not stop them but it’ll give them a nasty shock and hopefully encourage them to move on.
- Choose your allies wisely. You’ll definitely want a strong team, both in body and mind. You don’t want to wake up to one of your allies going postal having lost their marbles when unable to deal with the apocalyptic predicament you’ve found yourself in. It might also be best to befriend a psychologist with an expertise in trauma.
- Get buff! You’re likely going to have to do a lot of running and heavy lifting so you’ll want to get started on a serious Rocky training montage IMMEDIATELY!
BONUS: learn to eat and enjoy expired food! There’s no greater master of the expired MRE than Steve1989MREInfo. Without further ado, let’s get this out onto a tray. NICE!
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